Do I Persecute My Lord?

Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me...Acts 26:14

My morning devotional began with this scripture a few days ago (My Utmost for His Highest…C.S. Lewis)

Many of us know the story of Saul!

He was convinced that he needed to do whatever possible to oppose the name of Jesus of Nazareth, including…

Putting the Lord’s people in prison…

Sentencing them to death by casting his vote against them…

Traveling from one synagogue to another to have them punished…trying to force them to blaspheme…

He was so obsessed with persecuting them that he even hunted them down in foreign cities…Acts 26:9-11.

It’s hard to imagine that someone could be filled with so much rage that he would beat, whip, flog, stone to death those that chose to follow Jesus!

Yet, he did!

Until one day…on the road to Damascus…Saul saw a light from heaven, brighter than the sun, blazing around him and on his companions.  They all fell to the ground and Saul heard a voice saying to him…”Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me…Acts 26:12-14.

Each time I have read this story; my initial thought is that I would never persecute my Lord! 

Not me!  I could never do that!

But as I read my daily devotional that morning, the words literally jumped off the page and spoke deep within my spirit…spoke directly to my heart!

I read…

Am I set on my own way for God?  We are never free from this snare

until we are brought into the experience of the baptism of the Holy Ghost

and fire.  Obstinacy and self-will will always stab Jesus Christ.  It may

hurt no one else, but it wounds His Spirit!  Whenever we are obstinate

and self-willed and set upon our own ambitions, we are hurting Jesus.

Every time we stand on our rights and insist that this is what we intend

to do, we are persecuting Jesus.  Whenever we stand on our dignity

we systematically vex and grieve His Spirit; and when the knowledge

comes home that it is Jesus Whom we have been persecuting all

the time, it is the most crushing revelation there could be…My Utmost

For His Highest…C. W. Lewis…January 28.

No, I have never beaten anyone.

I have never had anyone thrown in prison.

I have never stood and watched a man be stoned to death!

But yes, I have persecuted Jesus.

Have I ever been obstinate and self-willed?  Absolutely!  More times than I would like to share!

There are times when I have been no better than a young two-year old…crossing her arms…stamping her foot on the ground…demanding that she get her own way!

Have I told Jesus this is what I intend to do without seeking Him?

Again, more times than I would like to share!

And as I let those words soak deep into my heart…I realized that I have persecuted Jesus with my thoughts…words…and actions!

I have grieved His Spirit!

And just as my daily devotion stated…I was crushed when I realized what I have done…how I have hurt Jesus!

All I could do was bow my head and ask my Heavenly Father to forgive me for all of the times I have persecuted him!

And praise God!  He does just that…He forgives me!  And He remembers my sins no more!

Just as Saul had a conversion on the road to Damascus, we too can have that conversion.

And just as God used Saul (also known as Paul) to preach the gospel…He can use us too!

We serve a loving God who desires nothing more than for us to come to Him…to have very real and personal relationship with Him.

And I was encouraged as I finished reading the last few words of my devotional…

            The Spirit of Jesus is conscious of one thing only – a perfect oneness

            with the Father, and He says, “Learn of Me; for I am meek and lowly

in heart.”  All I do ought to be founded on a perfect oneness with Him,

not on a self-willed determination to be godly.  This will mean that I can

be easily put upon, easily over-reached, easily ignored; but if I submit

to it for His sake, I prevent Jesus Christ being persecuted… My Utmost

For His Highest…C. W. Lewis…January 28.

Dear Heavenly Father…thank you for forgiving us for the times we have persecuted you.  Thank you for forgiving all of our sins…and thank you that as we desire and strive to have a perfect oneness with You…we will be prevented from persecuted you!  Oh, how I love you!